11dp3dt

Last night the acupuncturist took my pulse and say "Oh! you have a very clear rolling pulse so you are definitely pregnant (!)...............or have some kind of phlegm issue, like a stomach ache" Um yeah, my stomach was bothering me all day, thanks.

And I didn't POAS again this morning as planned and immediately regretted it after I started peeing. I really, really, really hope that my HPT from yesterday was wrong (but I know it's not). Anyway I'm all out of my good HPTs - only a stinkin' digital left and I will only use that again when I know I'm PG. I hate the very clear message "NOT PREGNANT". Yeah, thanks. So maybe I need to run out and get a couple FRERs to torture myself...

DH and I had an interesting discussion last night. If this FET doesn't work he was saying that he doesn't have the energy to do a lot more cycles. And I'm ready to keep on going until I've exhausted all avenues. So we have a little discrepancy in what we want to do. I can see his point because we have had our lives in limbo for a couple of years now and it'd be nice to feel like we're "living" again.

But I'm a little annoyed because if I knew that earlier I might have been more aggressive about this cycle - e.g., done the Intralipids...pushed for the steroids. Things that we discussed and decided together that we can push for in future cycles. So if we have a limited number of cycles that puts the pressure on, huh?

So we might just skip a final FET down here and really just focus on cycling up in NYC once or twice (yikes). So given how long I'll have to wait for my initial consult up there (November) I probably won't be cycling again until early 2007 because I know they close down in December. So with the cancellations & delays & a mini-break we only had three attempts this whole entire year.

I could theoretically get in on a cancellation slot sooner. But before that can happen I also need to send up CD2 bloodwork from a non-medicated cycle. So we'd have to take a month off of all meds so I can do the bloodwork (putting us into late October). And then I can try to get a cancellation spot. Which is only a week or two before my currently scheduled appt so that doesn't buy us much. And I'm assuming that some of my tests have "expired" so I'll need to redo some things. And if we do something like co-culturing that would take up another cycle as well.

So I guess I'm kinda pissy today because I am impatient and frustrated that it takes so f'in long to cycle. And then when we do cycle, it doesn't work. I hate IF.