Friday, November 03, 2006

endo: bittersweet diagnosis

My lap went well yesterday. Turns out that I did have lots of endo and the RE removed it. So now I'm trying to research whether it's better to jump right into another IVF cycle (after being freshly "cleaned out") or to look at additional treatments (Lupr0n Dep0t) before starting.

After having unexplained IF all of this time, having a diagnosis is in some ways reassuring. I know what it is (assuming it's our only issue) and we can treat it. And it definitely could explain the elevated NKs (endo causes scarring and inflammation, which triggers NKs).

But having endo seems like a really big deal. There are plenty of women who I've read about who never had luck with endo. Also my aunt who adopted her three kids had endo. So did my aunt who had successful IVFs. So it does make me concerned that we will never be able to conceive our own children.

So it is a bittersweet diagnosis.

But the lap itself was fine and I'm in relatively little pain. Actually my mouth and throat bother me the most. I joked with DH that they had the JV team (it's a teaching hospital) put in my breathing tube. My stomach muscles feel like I've done 1 million sit-ups and I can't really pull myself up to sit without using my arms. And I'm walking around like a caveman but haven't had to take any pain meds since being in the recovery room. No nausea or other side effects from the general anesthesia. So overall I feel like it was best-case scenario.

recap of my lap experience so I can remember later:
- DH ran down to a late-night deli to get grilled cheese sandwiches right before midnight so I wouldn't be too hungry the next day (love him!)
- slept fine for most of the night despite the traffic noise below
- when I woke up around 7am I was able to take my thyroid medicine in the morning with a little water per my doctor's instruction
- realized that my period started; my RE joked that I'd probably get it when I was laying on the table
- took a nice hot shower
- walked DH over to the RE's office so he could get his bloodwork done (1 vial); he's a complete wimp about bloodwork so I had to escort him. :)
- realized that we had a couple of hours left to kill so we went back to the hotel room
- headed over early because it was in a different part of the hospital than I'd been in before
- we got there in 2 minutes and proceeded to wait around for the next 2+ hours
- they took me back fairly quickly to get my PJs on and then I waited for an hour for the nurse to interview me and give me my IV
- I used my old faithful vein for my IV and now I'm regretting it because it's got a huge lump on it now...and it was already starting to develop scar tissue with our last FET; hopefully I haven't abused it too much
- then they went to grab Nick and we waited around for another 45-60 minutes
- don't read this Smarshy: actually we did go & pee together; he helped me with the IV :)
- then my doctor and his "fellow" came to get me
- we took the stairs up one floor because the elevator takes forever
- we went into the operating room and I was fascinated by all of the equipment
- met the nurses & anesthesiologists, answered some questions, and signed some more forms
- it took me a minute to lose my PJ pants & undies (remember I just got my period that morning) and my RE joked around that he thought after all of my IVF procedures that I'd drop my pants for anyone faster than that (I heart him - soooo funny!)
- jump up on the tall table
- they pull my arms out of my PJ top and stick me with monitors
- RE tells me to stick around until Saturday so I tell him that if he sees my DH before me to please ask him to book a room (we had a hard time finding reservations for Friday night)
- the main anesthesiologist tells me we will get started in a bit
- chit chat a little more and next thing I know they are asking me to scoot over to another bed
- then roll me down to a recovery room for serious surgeries because the ambulatory section is completely full
- I was next to a guy who had brain surgery and also a woman in A LOT of pain
- I was pretty out of it at first and my vision was very blurry; also I got dizzy if I moved my head too quickly to one side
- I felt some cramping and asked for some pain medication; the nurse got it right away and I felt a lot better (can't remember what it's called); I also got some Tylenol before leaving as well
- time flew by very quickly and before I knew it 1 hour or so had passed
- the nurses were really nice and brought me some apple juice and a muffin
- my RE came down to find me and told me about the endo and called it the "best case scenario" for our upcoming cycle; he also showed me some pics of the endo that I can pick up later
- the nurses eventually find my DH and ask him to come down
- it took a long time for me to feel ready to pee; once I did I got dressed carefully - wasn't 100% on my feet
- got my discharge info and peed and we were out of there
- we stopped by the deli to get some Ben & Jerry's ice cream on our way back to the room
- we also ordered some Italian food and started watching TV when I finally crashed
- I slept pretty well last night and haven't need to take any Tylenol or Percocet yet
- DH confirmed that we could stay an additional night in our room so we didn't have to move (yay!)
- my mouth and throat are killing me though! the right part of my lip is swollen and sore. my throat feels like it always needs to be cleared (which hurts my tummy) and is very sore. the nasty plastic taste has finally left my mouth, but it took several hours for that to go away.
- a nurse called a couple hours ago to check on me; she said to gargle with salt water and mention the sore throat to my doctor when I see him tomorrow

So all in all it went really well. I'm glad we stayed the extra day so my body has a better chance to heal. But I'm really REALLY looking forward to getting back home tomorrow and cuddling with Maggie!!


Heather said...

I'm glad it went well and hope you feel great soon!

Motel Manager said...

Glad you made it through! Where was the endo? What stage was it?

If it makes you feel any better, I asked both my clinic (a good one) and CCRM (obviously a good one) if endo patients had any different success rates than the clinics' overall rates, and in both cases they said no. So your chances should still be as good.

theoneliner said...

i'm glad things didn't go sooo bad for you.

Endo is scary to contemplate...I'm doing the same. You just have to know that the VAST MAJORITY OF WOMEN with endo have babies. Yes, there are a a very small minority of women with endo who cannot have children...but that's not likely you.

I assume since you previously had unexplained that you really didn't have symptoms of endo, right? Well, that kind of endo isn't generally the kind tht makes you unable to have children.

Endo is your aunt's diagnosis doesn't control yours. And 5 years in IVF land is a looong time...i.e. an IVF today is a heck of a lot different thatn even an IVF 5 years ago-so, just b/c it didn't work for her doesn't mean that it won't for you.

good luck this cycle.

Southern Comfortable said...

I'm glad there's a diagnosis, at least, but I understand what you mean about it being bittersweet.

The breathing tube pain was the worst part for me. Do they put sandpaper around that thing or something?? I expect your recovery will be worse than mine, since they removed so much endo from you. Hang in there.

Thalia said...

I'm sorry you've been diagnosed with endo. I, too, had no symptoms before an exploratory lap discovered moderate endo. It's not an encouraging diagnosis, I hope that for you it will have helped set the scene for a good cycle and a great pregnancy.